Welcome to Feeling Fragile

Welcome to the first post at Feeling Fragile!

My name is Erin and the person behind the keyboard, after a two year break from writing mental health content I realised that I needed to get back into it not just for me but for my peers, friends and fellow mental health consumers. The purpose of this post is to give you a brief overview of what to expect to see here at Feeling Fragile and also to get to know me more. 

Feeling Fragile is a space to learn more about mental health issues, chronic health issues, and disabilities all from a lived experience perspective. It’s a place to get lost in and find answers or create more questions. It's a space to keep up with relevant issues that impact those most vulnerable. Most of all, it’s a space that hopes to reduce the stigma surrounding how people see others (and themselves) and their issues.

Next Monday the first series will be launched called Mental Health Myths which aims to break down the myths that people still believe surrounding mental health and work out if there is any truth to these myths and if there isn't why are people still believing them? This series will lay out the foundation for future series that will cover more in-depth topics. 

In addition to these posts, there will be reviews of popular movies, TV series, books and more that are centred around the theme of mental health. Looking at how accurate they are from a lived experience perspective, what themes do they focus on, and do they serve those with mental health issues?

As mentioned before, I am Erin, I am a qualified mental health/live experience peer worker who is passionate about changing how the sector sees those with mental health issues having witnessed and experienced first-hand the stigma and discrimination those can face with mental health issues. A big way to reduce this stigma and discrimination is by educating those around us and not being afraid to share our mental health experiences. Every single person has a story to tell you just need to listen. 

My story isn't straightforward, and I am still learning about how my mental health issues impact me and why I am the way I am. 

I was always anxious right from having separation anxiety at 6 months old, I often joke that if you could diagnose a baby with anxiety that would be me! It was no surprise when I was diagnosed with anxiety at the age of 11 by a child psychologist and my parents having tried everything (and I mean everything) realised that medication was what I most likely needed to get both my life and theirs back. At the age of 12, I saw a child psychiatrist who took one look at me and prescribed me medication because it was obvious that I needed it. Medication helped me feel like myself for the first time in a long time and it gave me my life back of course I still experienced panic attacks, and the anxiety was still there, but things were much more manageable. 

At the age of 18, I was diagnosed with panic attack disorder (which is a separate diagnosis from anxiety) and later depression. I started to see my clinical psychologist who worked with me to recognise when a panic attack would happen and how to have better control of my anxiety. My psychologist helped me get out of my comfort zone and do things I never would've dreamed of. I was able to study, volunteer and share my story and the anxiety didn't hold me back. 

Of course, life likes to throw things at you and at the age of 25 I started to have chronic health issues, that despite my persistence haven't gone away and it's been hard to find a cause for them. I have seen numerous specialists, tried multiple treatments and had multiple diagnoses none of which seem to exactly fit. In the middle of battling chronic health issues and navigating the healthcare system I needed to walk away from a job that I loved producing and writing content around mental health and subsequently, my mental health took a dive. I started to experience things I hadn't experienced in a long time and at the advice of my psychologist and doctor I ended up in Step Up/Step Down mental health inpatient service for 4 weeks. I had hoped to never experience this, but it was what I needed and allowed me time to heal in a safe space surrounded by supportive professionals and others going through similar situations. It was due to this stay that I was introduced to mental health peer workers and decided that I wanted to go down that career path, so I took a chance and applied for the following year's intake, and I was successful. 

What followed was a year where I was pushed way out of my comfort zone, my views were challenged, and I learnt how to embrace the difficult thoughts and feelings that come with being a peer worker. In the middle of it all I got diagnosed with ADHD which helped me understand more about myself and how my brain works. I wondered at times if I would ever complete the qualification, but I did. Studying peer work was one of the best decisions and it has come out of such a dark time in my life. 

This leads to now, I'm a qualified peer worker navigating the ever-changing mental health sector while being determined to create change within it, all the while managing chronic health issues and navigating neurodivergence. 

Launching Feeling Fragile is a way for me to start that change within the mental health sector combining my love of writing, passion for mental health and peer work skills and I hope that you will stay around to see it happen.